I knew it was too good to be true

Gollum and I have had a long and sordid history. One day, in future blog post(s), I will get into the history and our rocky relationship and what has led us to where we are today. It’s long and painful but it needs to be told and I think blogging about it will help me to, perhaps, understand it all better and maybe hindsight will help me, moving forward. For the present, ever since my girl recently had surgery, Gollum and I have been getting along just fine. During my girl’s recovery time, Gollum would text and call ME, as she knew I was the one caring for my girl.


Coupled with the fact that Big Papa’s business is incredibly busy this time of year and that my job is incredibly flexible, I have been doing 90% of the pick-up/drop-off’s alone. In the past, when my girl was sick, Gollum would communicate with me as, obviously, I am the one caring for the sick child. After my girl returned to her usual self, the communication with me was then cut off. I expected that after my girl recovered from her surgical procedure that communication would subsequently be cut off between Gollum and I.

Surprisingly, it didn’t for the last month or so. Until today. Golllum has been texting me when she was on her way to drop my girl off to me and also text when determining who would be taking her to a weekend birthday party, for example. She even texted me after said party to see if my girl enjoyed it (ummm, what?) and I responded kindly back and ended up emailing her a picture from the party. Nice, yes? I mentioned to my sister and my mom how thankful I was that Gollum and I were able to communicate effectively, FINALLY, after seven years.

I think that is what all stepmoms are looking for from the birth-mother’s. We want to be respected as a fellow caretaker of the child, and to be given the opportunity to communicate effectively. After all, we are all on the same side, aren’t we? We are all on the side of the child. We all want to see our child succeed and love and grow into adulthood as fine, upstanding citizens.

Back to today. Gollum called and texted Big Papa about a change in pick-up spot for my girl this afternoon. Big Papa then had to stop his work day, call me to make sure I could accommodate the change and then text Gollum back that this change was okay with me/us. Doesn’t that seem like a waste of time (for us)?

I have been doing these pick-ups on Tuesday afternoons, without deviation, for the last two and a half months. Today, suddenly, she decides that she doesn’t want to speak with me about it. I tried to think back to the last time I saw her and if I had said or done anything that she could take and twist into something awful. I couldn’t think of anything at all. Had my girl just been incessantly talking about me and our fun weekend? What could it possibly be? I am tired of trying to figure out her warped way of thinking. I had hoped that our newfound communicative relationship would withstand her mood swings and whatever it is in her head that makes her be hateful towards me.

As small as it is, I has bothered me today. However, I did owe her a response on our vacation time. So I texted Gollum the information, thanked her for being patient with my response and said,” Big Papa told me you texted him for me to pick up my girl at your mom’s today – what time?” I’m sure Gollum gave Big Papa this information but as small as it may seem, I felt the need to assert the fact that I was still the one handling the transportation and majority of the caretaking for my girl. Is that petty of me? I didn’t think so. Normally, I would’ve let this type of thing go and chalk it up to her mood swings and her crushing insecurity but I won’t let her waste our precious time any longer with these games. She did nicely text me back the time but I will be asking Big Papa to respond to any further texts and calls on pick-up/drop-off’s, that I’ll be doing, by telling Gollum to contact me directly as she has been doing for the last two months. We are all adults here. Get over it.